The Seventh Day Shopper

The Church of the Seventh day Shopper
Has established a popular creed
As religions go, its a whopper
For those with a fervour to feed
Conveniently placed, community based
And catering to every need

A minister waits at the entrance
Whose mission it is to greet
The hordes that turn out with a vengeance
Their sacred rites to complete
Lost in prayer, and unaware
As trolleys run over your feet.

Any check-out disciples doubting
Or showing the signs of strain
Are offered a pilgrims outing
To retreats in which to retrain
And after some while, re-emerge with a smile
And freshly laundered brain.

Religions with far less appeal
Where congregations are small
Could offer a similar deal
To those who answer the call
Like, after you`ve died, if not satisfied
A refund.........no quibbles at all!